Category Archives: random thoughts

Motivational Mondays

Hi guys! It’s been a while since the last time I posted and I have got to say, I have missed it. I have to at least offer you guys an explanation. As you guys may remember, if you care to, I started a new job last month and it has kept me hopping like the Easter bunny. At any rate, I know some of you need that extra push on Monday mornings. So let’s get cracking!

Courage doesn’t always roar.
Sometimes courage is the quiet voice
at the end of the day saying,
“I will try again tomorrow.”
– Mary Anne Radmacher

Life is hard. It always has been and it probably always will be. The one thing we have to do to get through it though is keep moving. The problem with that is sometimes life can (and will) seemingly drain you of your will to keep moving or of your ability to get up after a setback. We’ve always known that life will knock you down, what we didn’t know is that it takes a lot of courage to get back up and fight on.

Mondays have a way of taking it all out of you. If it does, so what? Put it back on Tuesday. You get out of life what you put into it and if you’re not putting in any courage, you won’t get any back. Muster up all the courage you can find and try it again tomorrow. So instead of complaining about how bad today is and what you didn’t get out of it, exercise some of that quiet courage, shut up and just do it.

Father your children…

For the past couple of days the interwebs have been all abuzz with foolishness about Chris Brown’s fans and Too Short’s “fatherly advice” to young boys. Clearly, I missed something.

Millions of these children Tweeted about how they’d “let Chris Brown beat” them. They were of course referencing the incident of domestic violence between him and his then girlfriend, Rhianna. I know it was a while ago but we can never forget. I, of course, can’t blame Chris Brown for the foolishness that happened during his performance at the Grammys. I can, however, blame these lil’ girls, lil’ gays and their parents. While there are those of us who can not let it go, there is no way these girls, and gays, should be joking about letting him beat them.

As was stated here before, I have zero tolerance for domestic violence. While Brown has paid his debt to society by doing as mandated by the court, there are some folks who just won’t ever forgive his actions. I get that. I also get that to some of his fans, he can do no wrong and they still lust after him.

Kids will be kids but parents have to be parents. I’m sure some of these parents could not possibly have known what their daughters were saying. I insist that they need to find out, particularly fathers. I’ve discussed that fathers have a responsibility to their daughters, and yes, their gay sons, too, to show them how they should be treated while dating. They need to actually sit down and discuss with them what is and isn’t acceptable. The fact that these children even Tweeted the words, “Chris Brown can beat me up…” is both frightening and sickening.

As a father, you need to explain that it’s never OK to even joke about domestic violence. There are too many folks who have lost their lives for it. You need to explain no matter how fine he is or how well he sings or dances that it is NEVER OK for a boy, a guy, a man to put his hands on you in a violent manner. Ever. Grab your daughters and your gay sons, hug them and show them how a man is supposed to treat them.

If that’s not enough motivation to parent your own damn kids, Too Short has taken to offering up fatherly advice to young men about “how to turn young girls out.” O_o Yea, that Too Short.

Why is his old ass still relevant enough to grace the web pages of XXL in anything but a historical retrospect of Bay Area rappers? The last time Too Short was relevant was whenever “Shake Dat Monkey” came out and it had ratchet chicks from near and far shaking it up in the club.

Apparently in a video posted on XXL’s site, Too Short told young boys transitioning from middle to high school, in graphic detail, how to sexually stimulate their female counterparts – forcefully. Far be it from me to bait anyone on any issue but from what I read and heard about the video because I didn’t see it, it is akin to assault. The Grio quoted Too Short saying in the video, “You push her up against the wall, you take your finger and put a little spit on it and you stick your finger in her underwear and you rub it on there and watch what happens.”

First of all, any father of a daughter should be outraged and ready to string Too Short up and flog his ass for suggesting any boy do that to a girl. That statement suggests that he is an advocate of sexual aggression and that attention uninvited is in fact rape. How dare he suggest and describe that for young boys? His suggestion to the boys gives the impression that girls don’t deserve to decide whether or not they want this attention. It suggests that these boys seize their opportunity whenever they feel like it. I can’t, no, I won’t sit, stand or walk for this kind of bullshit.

This is why you monitor what your kids are watching online. Nothing good can come of minors watching anything Too Short-related. The man raps about hard life and pimping in Oakland. He has never discussed a single thing in his music that would imply that he respects any woman. I will say that he issued an apology via video on the XXL site. He covered himself by saying he was in “Too Short” mode and that these young boys should just be themselves and not get caught up in “hip hop personas.” O_o

Fathers, when it comes to your sons, it is your job to do exactly the opposite of that bullshit Too Short spewed in that video and in his music. It is up to you to explain to your sons that no is always no. Explain that women are to be respected and treated like human beings and not property there for their lustful fantasies. Tell them that rappers like Too Short are all persona and that the life they rap about and perpetuate is but a caricature. In other words, father them. Father all your children.

As a father, as a man, you are charged with being the leader of your family. You are the one who shows your family the way. If you are not cutting the path and leading the way, they will latch on to someone who will. The problem with that is they could latch on to someone who doesn’t know where the hell they’re going. Your family is your responsibility. When you fail to parent your children, you have failed them and us, too. Step up and do your job.

Motivational Mondays …

“The thing about new beginnings is that they require something else to end…”
– Anonymous

Happy New Week!!! Today’s post is going to be short and sweet. Y’know, like me! ;-)

As you guys know, I was laid off back in October and have been frantically looking for a job. It turns out all I had to do was wait. I was offered a position in November. I knew then it was going to take a while for the position to be open, yet I was stressing for no reason. My layoff was a lot shorter than some folks and for that I am grateful.

In the world of journalism and really in this tough economy, a lot of folks are being laid off from jobs that they loved, jobs that they hated and jobs that they needed. Regardless, I know how it feels. I’m still praying for and with you. Your next move will be your best yet. We have all been set up for something great. Now it a great time to explore the things that have been forced to the back burner by life.

Today’s quote from an anonymous source is some of the realest -ish I have ever read. So many of us were stuck in jobs simply because it’s what we knew how to do. Now that what we know how to do has been snatched away, we have to learn to adapt. We’ve got to stretch ourselves and get back to what it is that really makes us happy.

Speaking for myself, I never would have quit my job. I especially never would have pursued the kind of job I’m walking into today. That job HAD to end in order for me to move forward and take chances on new opportunities. For those of you who are in the thick of it, hang in there. Your better opportunity is coming soon. Until then, take a gander at The Alchemist. Find out what your own personal legend is and take the first step in the journey to find it. I’m excited for your futures – and mine, too.

Motivational Mondays

“The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude.”
(c) Oprah Winfrey

Happy New Week to you all!

Now that the weekend is over, it’s time to hit the ground running. You’ve probably walked into work to a mountain of messages, seemingly extra bubbly people who you simply don’t have time to deal with and you are probably less energetic than on Monday mornings than you are after you’ve worked a full day. I know it’s been ingrained in us to absolutely abhor Mondays, I propose we try something different.

Mighty O

For me, Oprah is the most inspiring person I have never met. While she is wealthy, it is not her wealth that makes me want to do better, it is because she is unapologetically her authentic self no matter who is offended. I. Love. It! What I also love is her willingness to share with the masses the wisdom she’s gained over the course of her life’s journey. Since she’s shared it before, I am going to share it again.

In the quote above, the Mighty O states that your future can be changed by simply changing your attitude. I happen to be a believer. We may not all have control over what happens to us in our lives but we do have control over our attitudes. Our reactions. Our ability to roll with the punches. How we treat others. I want to encourage you to shift your thinking and subsequently your attitude toward Monday. Let’s start by dissociating negative terms from it like mad and manic. How about we start using positive words like mighty and masterful or majestic. There is power in words, use it to your advantage.

Some years back, Oprah discussed on her show, the power of “The Secret.” The secret to success is all about willing great things to you. Part of that is speaking it to existence. That being said, speak greatness to your Monday and then speak it to the rest of your week.

Go see Red Tails…

For the past couple of weeks, the interwebs have been abuzz with talk about the movie, “Red Tails.” It’s a fictionalized story about the all-black regiment of fighter pilots, the Tuskegee Airmen, set in Italy in World War II. We get to meet a bunch of (fine ass) black men from different walks of life who were all a part of the “Tuskegee Experience” that wanted to test whether or not black men would be smart enough to be fighter pilots.

While I would just love to give you a history lesson, I would much rather you click this link and educate your damn selves. Personally, I interviewed a Tuskegee Airman so, I’m good. It’s a wonderful story in which all people need to be aware. I sincerely hope this movie will make people want to know more about it. Now, as for the movie and all these damn critics …

Dear Universe, you will never be able to satisfy an entire group of people. All men aren’t fans of the same thing nor are all men neither are all white people and definitely not all black people. “Red Tails” is no different. This movie has gotten a lot of attention because it is an all black cast and Mr. Star Wars, George Lucas, put up $100 million of his own money because he couldn’t get Hollywood to invest. That being said, black folks everywhere set out to prove Hollywood wrong and support this historic biopic. Problem is it wasn’t a biopic. Negroes flocked to the movie in droves expecting to see an Oscar-worthy film starring black men who were men of honor who were being snubbed by a system that sought to keep them down. They got an action movie.

I’m not sure if you are familiar with action movies but they aren’t famous for the dialogue, the sentiment or their maintenance of the integrity of whatever period they are highlighting. Action movies are known for action. Fights and explosions and shit like that. But because this one was financed by George Lucas and involved Cuba Gooding Jr. and Terrence Howard, black folks expected something major. *smh* Look, if you went to see Red Tails and went to learn the story of the Tuskegee Airmen and you were disappointed that you got an action movie, that’s your fault.

Nobody ever billed this movie to be anything more than an action film. But because it stars an abundance of black men we turned it into a demonstration against the racial injustice in the Hollywood establishment. We have to get over ourselves. We need to realize that more black quality films aren’t being made because we aren’t demanding them. Some of us continue to be pissed about movies like Red Tails yet they line up in droves for the latest in Tyler Perry’s never-ending story of the downtrodden black woman with the dark-skinned villains.

I have never in all my movie-watching days seen reviews more mixed for a movie than this one. Ever. “This was an awesome black film!” “That movie sucked! Don’t waste your money!” “I wish they would have done more.” “Why weren’t there any black women in the movie?” “He was with a white woman!” Blah. Blah. Blah. Blah! *smh* Some of y’all need to see this movie for what it was – entertainment. I looked at this movie the same as I would “Captain America,” “Superman,” or any other hero movie. The only difference here is there were actual Tuskegee Airmen.

Personally, I think “Red Tails” made strides in how black men are perceived in hero movies. Up until now we only had Will Smith, Denzel Washington, Cuba Gooding Jr. and Sam Jackson. Now, we’ve got an assload of black heroes for them to choose from. Let’s just support this movie for being what it is, the first all-black action flick since the blacksploitation period and keep it moving.

Let’s stop taking shit to higher and higher levels of foolishness and irrelevance by getting in our feelings. I need for y’all to come out of there and join the rest of us in the real world. This movie was made to see black men catapulted to the role of hero not to give black films relevance. That’s our job. You want to see more quality black films? Let’s support the ones we do have coming out and demand better of our own filmmakers. If nothing else, go see it for yourself and stop taking everyone else’s word for it.