Category Archives: insanity

Father your children…

For the past couple of days the interwebs have been all abuzz with foolishness about Chris Brown’s fans and Too Short’s “fatherly advice” to young boys. Clearly, I missed something.

Millions of these children Tweeted about how they’d “let Chris Brown beat” them. They were of course referencing the incident of domestic violence between him and his then girlfriend, Rhianna. I know it was a while ago but we can never forget. I, of course, can’t blame Chris Brown for the foolishness that happened during his performance at the Grammys. I can, however, blame these lil’ girls, lil’ gays and their parents. While there are those of us who can not let it go, there is no way these girls, and gays, should be joking about letting him beat them.

As was stated here before, I have zero tolerance for domestic violence. While Brown has paid his debt to society by doing as mandated by the court, there are some folks who just won’t ever forgive his actions. I get that. I also get that to some of his fans, he can do no wrong and they still lust after him.

Kids will be kids but parents have to be parents. I’m sure some of these parents could not possibly have known what their daughters were saying. I insist that they need to find out, particularly fathers. I’ve discussed that fathers have a responsibility to their daughters, and yes, their gay sons, too, to show them how they should be treated while dating. They need to actually sit down and discuss with them what is and isn’t acceptable. The fact that these children even Tweeted the words, “Chris Brown can beat me up…” is both frightening and sickening.

As a father, you need to explain that it’s never OK to even joke about domestic violence. There are too many folks who have lost their lives for it. You need to explain no matter how fine he is or how well he sings or dances that it is NEVER OK for a boy, a guy, a man to put his hands on you in a violent manner. Ever. Grab your daughters and your gay sons, hug them and show them how a man is supposed to treat them.

If that’s not enough motivation to parent your own damn kids, Too Short has taken to offering up fatherly advice to young men about “how to turn young girls out.” O_o Yea, that Too Short.

Why is his old ass still relevant enough to grace the web pages of XXL in anything but a historical retrospect of Bay Area rappers? The last time Too Short was relevant was whenever “Shake Dat Monkey” came out and it had ratchet chicks from near and far shaking it up in the club.

Apparently in a video posted on XXL’s site, Too Short told young boys transitioning from middle to high school, in graphic detail, how to sexually stimulate their female counterparts – forcefully. Far be it from me to bait anyone on any issue but from what I read and heard about the video because I didn’t see it, it is akin to assault. The Grio quoted Too Short saying in the video, “You push her up against the wall, you take your finger and put a little spit on it and you stick your finger in her underwear and you rub it on there and watch what happens.”

First of all, any father of a daughter should be outraged and ready to string Too Short up and flog his ass for suggesting any boy do that to a girl. That statement suggests that he is an advocate of sexual aggression and that attention uninvited is in fact rape. How dare he suggest and describe that for young boys? His suggestion to the boys gives the impression that girls don’t deserve to decide whether or not they want this attention. It suggests that these boys seize their opportunity whenever they feel like it. I can’t, no, I won’t sit, stand or walk for this kind of bullshit.

This is why you monitor what your kids are watching online. Nothing good can come of minors watching anything Too Short-related. The man raps about hard life and pimping in Oakland. He has never discussed a single thing in his music that would imply that he respects any woman. I will say that he issued an apology via video on the XXL site. He covered himself by saying he was in “Too Short” mode and that these young boys should just be themselves and not get caught up in “hip hop personas.” O_o

Fathers, when it comes to your sons, it is your job to do exactly the opposite of that bullshit Too Short spewed in that video and in his music. It is up to you to explain to your sons that no is always no. Explain that women are to be respected and treated like human beings and not property there for their lustful fantasies. Tell them that rappers like Too Short are all persona and that the life they rap about and perpetuate is but a caricature. In other words, father them. Father all your children.

As a father, as a man, you are charged with being the leader of your family. You are the one who shows your family the way. If you are not cutting the path and leading the way, they will latch on to someone who will. The problem with that is they could latch on to someone who doesn’t know where the hell they’re going. Your family is your responsibility. When you fail to parent your children, you have failed them and us, too. Step up and do your job.

Go see Red Tails…

For the past couple of weeks, the interwebs have been abuzz with talk about the movie, “Red Tails.” It’s a fictionalized story about the all-black regiment of fighter pilots, the Tuskegee Airmen, set in Italy in World War II. We get to meet a bunch of (fine ass) black men from different walks of life who were all a part of the “Tuskegee Experience” that wanted to test whether or not black men would be smart enough to be fighter pilots.

While I would just love to give you a history lesson, I would much rather you click this link and educate your damn selves. Personally, I interviewed a Tuskegee Airman so, I’m good. It’s a wonderful story in which all people need to be aware. I sincerely hope this movie will make people want to know more about it. Now, as for the movie and all these damn critics …

Dear Universe, you will never be able to satisfy an entire group of people. All men aren’t fans of the same thing nor are all men neither are all white people and definitely not all black people. “Red Tails” is no different. This movie has gotten a lot of attention because it is an all black cast and Mr. Star Wars, George Lucas, put up $100 million of his own money because he couldn’t get Hollywood to invest. That being said, black folks everywhere set out to prove Hollywood wrong and support this historic biopic. Problem is it wasn’t a biopic. Negroes flocked to the movie in droves expecting to see an Oscar-worthy film starring black men who were men of honor who were being snubbed by a system that sought to keep them down. They got an action movie.

I’m not sure if you are familiar with action movies but they aren’t famous for the dialogue, the sentiment or their maintenance of the integrity of whatever period they are highlighting. Action movies are known for action. Fights and explosions and shit like that. But because this one was financed by George Lucas and involved Cuba Gooding Jr. and Terrence Howard, black folks expected something major. *smh* Look, if you went to see Red Tails and went to learn the story of the Tuskegee Airmen and you were disappointed that you got an action movie, that’s your fault.

Nobody ever billed this movie to be anything more than an action film. But because it stars an abundance of black men we turned it into a demonstration against the racial injustice in the Hollywood establishment. We have to get over ourselves. We need to realize that more black quality films aren’t being made because we aren’t demanding them. Some of us continue to be pissed about movies like Red Tails yet they line up in droves for the latest in Tyler Perry’s never-ending story of the downtrodden black woman with the dark-skinned villains.

I have never in all my movie-watching days seen reviews more mixed for a movie than this one. Ever. “This was an awesome black film!” “That movie sucked! Don’t waste your money!” “I wish they would have done more.” “Why weren’t there any black women in the movie?” “He was with a white woman!” Blah. Blah. Blah. Blah! *smh* Some of y’all need to see this movie for what it was – entertainment. I looked at this movie the same as I would “Captain America,” “Superman,” or any other hero movie. The only difference here is there were actual Tuskegee Airmen.

Personally, I think “Red Tails” made strides in how black men are perceived in hero movies. Up until now we only had Will Smith, Denzel Washington, Cuba Gooding Jr. and Sam Jackson. Now, we’ve got an assload of black heroes for them to choose from. Let’s just support this movie for being what it is, the first all-black action flick since the blacksploitation period and keep it moving.

Let’s stop taking shit to higher and higher levels of foolishness and irrelevance by getting in our feelings. I need for y’all to come out of there and join the rest of us in the real world. This movie was made to see black men catapulted to the role of hero not to give black films relevance. That’s our job. You want to see more quality black films? Let’s support the ones we do have coming out and demand better of our own filmmakers. If nothing else, go see it for yourself and stop taking everyone else’s word for it.

Education = life changing …

For as long as I can remember I’ve always loved to learn. Cracking open a book, speaking with knowledgeable people, watching documentaries, reading the newspaper – anything that could guarantee that I would know more than when I started, I am all for it.

Because I love learning so much, my goal is to pass it along to as many folks as possible. Every time I get a chance, I encourage my nieces and nephews, godkids, cousins and everyone else’s child I meet to use all the resources available to them to learn as much as they can.

We have to do right by them...

While I’m still looking for work, I decided that I need to make myself useful and volunteer my time with a local organization run by my cousin and one of her classmates from high school.

This program is designed for low-income children who have failed their end-of-grade tests in reading and math. Because of my background in journalism and my minor in professional English, I am working mostly with the kids who are great at math but have problems reading. Early on, I figured out their problems with reading. These kids don’t speak English.

While they are American, they were born here and have lived here all their lives, they simply do not speak standard English. When you can’t speak a language, it usually translates into your reading. If you don’t understand what it is you’re reading, you can’t comprehend it. If you can’t comprehend what you read, you get labeled as dumb, slow, stupid and in America, that translates to inferior. I understand this life. I used to live this life.

While I have always enjoyed learning, I have never been a great test taker. In working with these kids, I see why I wasn’t. For the longest time, I’ve always heard that standardized tests are culturally biased and that the only universal part is the math. Now, I understand completely. The questions are worded in ways these children don’t speak. The people who create these tests word them in ways that are confusing to not only these children but to some of the people helping them learn about these tests. Somewhere these kids, and some of these adults, didn’t get what they needed in English and language arts classes.

A lot of these kids in this program live in the very projects where I spent my childhood and as much as I’d like to say that the neighborhood has changed for the better, it hasn’t. While it has improved aesthetically, it is still filled with an abundance of undereducated people who have deemed it uncool to be smart. It’s not popular to get good grades and God forbid you try to speak standard English. In trying to help one of my students better understand what he was reading by helping him to correctly pronounce words and making his subjects and verbs agree, he was ridiculed by his peers for “talking like a white boy.” We have to do better.

Though we didn’t give birth to them, these are our kids – all of them. As much as we hate to admit it, we’re getting older. Somebody will have to run this world when we no longer can. If we drop the ball in educating our kids who the hell will take care of us when we get old? You’ve set up your 401K and your IRA so that you’ll have money to take care of yourself but guess who you’ll be paying to do it? These kids.

A lot of us have similar stories of how we grew up in poor circumstances but overcame that by going to college. These are the stories our kids need to hear not the crap about a beef between Drake and Common. I am begging you guys to reach within your families, your communities or wherever to show these kids you care and just how your education has changed your life. We have GOT to do better, y’all!

Daddy’s girls unite!!!

My wonderful blog visitors, I have a confession to make. I am a “Daddy’s Girl.” I make no apologies for it. I don’t care who judges me. If anyone tries to come between me and my daddy or cause him harm of any kind, God have mercy on your wretched soul.

Deiondra Sanders

In a world where a lot of families are in their second generation of absentee fathers, my daddy and others like him go unnoticed by the world. That leaves us, their children, with the responsibility of holding them up for the world to see and in some cases defending them. Earlier today, all of Twitter was abuzz with the Tweets from Deiondra Sanders.

As if you couldn’t tell by her name, Deiondra is the eldest daughter of NFL Hall of Famer Deion Sanders. Sanders is currently involved in divorce proceedings with his estranged wife, Pilar, whom we were introduced to in their reality show “Prime Time Love.” Since the -ish has already hit the fan and sites like TMZ and MediaTakeOut have been dragged into all this, it is sure to get ugly. To make things uglier, Deiondra took to Twitter to air her frustrations about what Pilar is saying via her attorney. Notice my lack of scolding here.

This girl took to Twitter to defend her daddy from the foolishness. While I don’t agree with her methods, I understand her motives. To understand the way a daddy’s girl feels about her daddy is to understand how you feel about your first love. A daddy’s girl’s father IS her first love. He’s the first guy to make her day and usually the first man to let her down. If she is fortunate enough to have a father who has made her day more than he’s disappointed her she will usually fight anyone to the death who tries to bring him harm.

If you look at Deiondra’s page, baby girl went ham. Honey-baked. Picnic. Spiral-sliced. Honey glazed. Just ham. All in an effort to clear her daddy’s name. I don’t claim to know what went on in their family, we may never know the truth. What I do know is how it feels to have some chick make an attempt to bad mouth their father to make herself look good. Since Pilar’s team seems to be taking it to the media, I’m sure Deiondra felt the need to clear it up – in the media.

I just want y’all to cut the girl some slack. One of my followers on Twitter made the comment, “Fathers raise your daughters.” To that I answer, “he did.” He was so good at it in fact, she got pissed and she got it off her chest. This was her way of defending her father. No more, no less. Deiondra may look at her timeline tomorrow and issue an apology. She might not. You can read in her Tweets that she is hurt over the fact this chick came for her daddy. I feel her. How ever this turns out, this episode has not helped anything. Pilar could very well insist that her children not have anything to do with Deiondra. Pilar could use this episode to make her children harbor some kind of animosity toward her. I’ve been in a situation where you have multiple children who don’t share the same two parents. It can be stressful.

So, I ask y’all, please, cut the girl some slack. And daddy’s girls, let’s make a pact to conduct ourselves better. Our daddies are grown men, *sigh* they can fight their own battles.

For colored folks …

… who’ve considered homicide because they’ve had e-damn-nuf…

I certainly hope everyone’s Christmas was one to remember. If not, let’s hope things pick up for you on New Year’s. Now that the pleasantries are out of the way, I feel the need to address my people about recent news of some of our people losing their ever-loving minds over a motherbleepin’ sneaker! OK, lemme back up.

All that ruckus over this ugly ass shoe!

Last week, the Michael Jordan brand released the newest sneaker in its retro line, the Concords. The Air Jordan Concord made its debut in 1995 when I was all of 13 years old. According to my internet search, Jordan himself wore the shoes in the Eastern Conference finals. In 2000, the shoe made a comeback, much like Jordan himself and another variation of them in 2006. Now they are here again in 2011 making complete asses out of Negroes from coast to coast.

When the shoe was re-re-re-released last week, folks lined up by the thousands ready and willing to pay $180 for the shoes. Folks were trampled, got into fist fights, peppered sprayed by authorities, robbed all over a pair of sneakers. They are made of leather, rubber and plastic. Sneakers, people.

The hell?!

If that’s not enough, the Houston Fox affiliate KRIV managed to find and interview the finest coons the Lone Star State has to offer. As a former working journalist, I know for a fact that most of us do not seek out these folks to stick them on camera or in the newspaper. They seek US out because they want to be on TV or have their picture run in the paper. Journalists have a job to do and a deadline and if you ask black and brown people who look, act and speak like they have some sense and they decline, you have to go with what you have. Sadly, this is what they had.

If you people insist on buying these damn sneakers, I insist that you conduct yourselves like you weren’t raised in a barn. I hate to say this but spending $200 on a pair of sneakers is why black folks won’t ever get ahead. While these Negroes were out waiting in line for hours upon hours – overnight – on a pair of shoes, the smart people (black and white) who own stock in Nike are laughing at you all the way to the bank. You just handed over $200 of your hard earned money to people sitting in plush offices who can afford to throw $200 away. They likely made that in 2 hours. How long does it take you to make $200? #YesIamjudgingyou

Frankly, I am disgusted at this cooney display and have since filed my paperwork to enter the racial draft. I’m hoping to go with Wu-Tang to the Asian delegation. Konnichiwa, snitches!