These posts might be few and far between now that my Tweet game is so sick, son! OK, it’s really not. But still, Twitter allows me to communicate my every random thought at any given moment. So, to get us rolling, here are some of my most random thoughts and Tweets, tweaked of course.
They’d make the best ones. You don’t have to worry about them being too rough with the merchandise and their hands won’t be rough. And, I don’t have to worry about whether or not they are enjoying the exam. And the conversation during the exam would be AWESOME!
Wouldn’t we then have to walk on our hands and eat with our feet? That would be disgusting as crap! Wouldn’t that also mean that people’s hands would be as crusty and ashy as their feet? *shudder*
Weather in North Carolina can be tricky in the fall. It’s probably one of the only places in the world where you use heat and air conditioning in the same day. Still, no shorts should be worn after September. I wonder how many people get pneumonia behind that crap.
I can’t explain to my nieces and nephews that they should sound words out if you geniuses throw dumb shit like silent letters in on them. I won’t reprimand them for misspelling words like knife, neighbor and raspberry when, if spelled phonetically, it sounds like nife, naybor and razberry. How many kids got knocked outta spelling bees behind these words? Damn linguists!
I’ve tried to watch two of those damn shows and it took my ears a week to stop ringing. That chick is loud. I’m talking, marching band loud. I mean, foghorn loud. So loud, other loud people say, ‘Damn she loud!’ Maybe she doesn’t know she’s that loud. Like, maybe she needs to have her hearing checked. Yea, that’s it, she can’t hear herself so she doesn’t know she’s not using her indoor voice.
Maybe the imbeciles at BET should explain to her what a microphone is and that it picks up stuff, even when she’s whispering, just ask “Messy Jesse” Jackson. I’m jus’ saying, somebody needs to get that chick a hearing aid so she doesn’t have to yell at us. My bedroom TV is so low, I can hear her and no one else.
Now maybe girlfriend is that size 16 she lied about being in “Baby Boy.”
Loud One aside, we now have George Lopez every night and Wanda Sykes on Saturdays. Too bad George isn’t on network TV and Wanda only has one day a week on Fox. I guess one night of Wanda is all the liberal they need over at Fox, eh?
